A free personal online advice column

May 1, 2005
Dear Jenn,

Hi, I'm the mother of the groom and my next piece of business after we have the shower all organized is the ordering of rehersal dinner invitations, I'm keeping it simple to a business size page and folding 3 to fit in envelope. My friend is going to make these on her computer but I have no idea how to phrase the script, Can you tell me where I could find out?

Dear Mother of the Groom,
Rehearsal dinners are usually done verbally, but if you are planning a more formal event, and inviting others that won't be involved in the actual wedding rehearsal, then invitations would be a nice touch. I found this format at

Please join us for the rehearsal dinner
for the wedding of Mary and Bob
Dinner to take place at Brioni's
522 Broadway Avenue
on Thursday, July 15
at 7:30p.m.
immediately following
the wedding rehearsal

Mr. and Mrs. Mike Steeles* (this would be you and/or your husband)
Please R.S.V.P at (555) 555-5555

There is also a book that I used when I got married called "The Everything Wedding Organizer" by Laura Morin. You can find it at any bookstore. If you thumb through it, you might get a few more ideas, even if you didn't want to buy one. Good luck! Let me know if there is anything else I can do to help!

April 25, 2005
Dear Jenn,

Here is the problem: I am in my mid-twenties and have had a few sexual partners. I have NEVER had an orgasm from intercourse OR oral sex! I was beginning to think "it" was broken or something! I recently purchased a wonderful new toy that works VERY well!!! So, here is the question: What is wrong with all of these men?

Dear Beyond Frustrated,
If you're in your mid-twenties, the first thing that comes to mind is that your partners are probably rather inexperienced.

BUT, beyond that, it's very true that all women are different. Some can do it very easily, in any situation, and others have to really work at it. Still other women may not be able to at all! So the fact that your new "toy" is working at least shows you that you are capable. I would suggest really paying attention to what sets off that trigger for you, because, again, all women are very different, and what works for you may not work for someone else. You have to really learn from your own body. Then you need to show your partner exactly what it is that is your trigger, and hopefully the two of you can grow and experiment together!

April 11, 2005
Dear Jenn,

I have a situation I really need your help with. About three months ago, my husband went out of town for work. His best friend, who is also a close friend of mine, stayed the night with us the night my husband left, so he could take me to pick up the car the next day. My husband left around 4am, and I stayed asleep in my bed. Well, about an hour later I felt someone get in my bed. I was sound asleep, so I didn't realize it wasn't my husband. My husband's best friend, we'll call him "Bill", woke me up and proceeded to tell me that he has been in love with me since the first time we met, which was 5 years ago. After telling me this, he grabbed me and kissed me! This has posed a serious problem in our friendship! Ever since that night he has continued to share his feelings with me and try to convince me to leave my husband for him! We have all been friends for 5 years, and I really don't want to just write him off, but it is getting out of control! What do I do?

Dear Faithful Wife,
It sounds like you have not mentioned this to your husband, obviously, since "Bill" is still making advances towards you. Bill's actions are not only inappropriate, they are disrespectful. I'm also sensing that you are reluctant to bring this up to your husband, for fear that he will lose what he thinks is his best friend. I'm generally not a big advocate of ultimatums, but in this case, it seems necessary, and be prepared to back it up. You need to tell Bill that his advances are making you uncomfortable, and if he insists on continuing, you will be forced to tell your husband about them and Bill will lose you BOTH as friends! If he truly cares about your husband, or you, for that matter, he will rebury his feelings for you and go back to being a friend. If he doesn't, then the healthiest thing you can do for everyone involved is to bring it out into the open (by telling your husband) and cut him out of your lives altogether. Marriage is hard enough without adding stressors like that to the mix.


February 28, 2005
Dear Jenn,

I am wondering if the guy I like likes me? I have tried everything, and it still does not work. I really need help finding out .

Dear Wondering,
The best thing to do in this situation is "employ" a third party. Find someone you both know and ask them if they'd talk to him. If one of your friends will do it, that would be best. But if not, see if you can find one of his friends that you can talk to.

If that's not an option, my only advice would be to just come right out and ask him. This is 2005 now, and it's not unheard of for girls to ask guys out on a date. Ask him to go to a movie with you. If he likes you, he'll take it from there. I know that it's hard to get up the nerve to ask a guy out, I've had trouble doing it myself, but remember, the worst thing that can happen is that he says "no", right? Good luck! Let me know how it turns out!


January 17, 2005
Dear Jenn,

I really need help. My friend is sad because her puppy died. How can I make her feel better? Should I tell her that it was not her fault and that sometimes things happen that you can't change?

Dear Sympathetic,
That's a very good start. Losing a pet can be so hard, especially if you've had the pet in your family for a long time. It is NOT her fault and yes, sometimes things just happen. There is a beautiful poem called "The Journey", by Crystal Ward Kent that you could print out and give to her. I have it on my website for some of the critters I've lost in the past. You can read it here: The Journey

What's important is that you just let her talk and cry about her puppy as much as she wants. She will grieve in her own way.

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